Happy Parents
Often our biggest concerns are how we are going to get everything done, how well our children are going to do at school, what grades they will get, and what we think their careers are going to look like.
And while it is a given that in life our children all have to do something, and we all have to look after our economic well being, the evidence is that if we want our children to be happy adults (and who doesn't? ) then we should look at the results of the famous and often referred to Harvard 75 year longitudinal study on happiness. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grant_Study
It is not that surprising in a world in which there are so many things which demand our attention and create concerns for us that we forget that if we want our children to be happy as adults then what they need to do is have good warm relationships.
It is as simple as that.
If we can encourage our children through our modeling of good relationships with them, and this is especially important for the mother according to the Harvard study, then those children will learn to value, expect and create those relationships in their own lives.
And of course in being happier themselves they will create a similarly happy environment for their children and grandchildren.
The Grant Study is therefore a really good reminder for us as parents that while there are many demands and many fear factors in our lives in relation to educational outcomes, if we can ensure that our children are developing good warm relationships with us (something achieved by expressing that warmth, by shared activities together, by conversations and engagement in ordinary life) then we may go to bed at the end of the day comfortable in the knowledge that we, in the warmth of our relationships, are creating a very high likelihood that our children in their adult lives will be happy.
